Laugh for the day:

If you ever want to laugh, go to http://www.sincerelyinsane.com The guy that posts there writes crazy complaints to different companies, and he posts the responses he gets.

This is one of my favorites, with the reply beneath:

Peter Pan Bus Lines

Corporate Headquarters

PO Box 1776

Springfield, MA 01102-1776

February 19, 2007

Dear Peter Pan Bus Lines,

I’m not too sure I want to ride your buses anymore. I recently learned that Peter Pan peanut butter has been contaminated with salmonella, and I think there might be a link between the delicious spread and the transportation service.

If I ride your buses, will I get salmonella? I’ll bet the salmonella is sitting there on the bus seats, waiting for its next victim to sit down. But I, my friends, have prepared in advance with: a pair of pants. I’m almost certain that the bacteria cannot penetrate a layer of denim, not to mention my Hanes underwear, so I will most likely be safe. But I just wanted to make sure.

Before I set foot on a Peter Pan bus again, I would like written proof that the buses are safe as long as I am wearing pants. Also, which kinds of pants are not suitable, i.e. the ones that salmonella can penetrate? Do I have to wear jeans, or can they be corduroys? How about Dockers? And is underwear all that necessary?

Thank you for your assistance, and I can assure you I will no longer ride your bus lines without any pants. I know this outbreak is not your fault, but I am taking giant strides of safety (pants) to assure my well-being.

Sincerely,

Kevin Dickinson

Who is Wearing Pants

P.S. Should I wash my jeans after riding your bus?

Dear Mr. Dickinson,

Thank you for your letter dated February 19, 2007 regarding the recent salmonella contamination of Peter Pan peanut butter and its relationship to Peter Pan Bus Lines.

We have recently received literally hundreds of inquiries from customers like you who are concerned about this issue. I assure you we are taking the matter very seriously and have implemented appropriate measures to ensure the safety of our ridership.

Immediately upon learning of the salmonella outbreak, our Safety and Security Team consulted with the Department of Homeland Security... together, they swiftly went into action and instituted the following policy:

It has been determined that denim, corduroy and Dockers are 100% safe materials and cannot be penetrated by the salmonella virus. Nevertheless, all Peter Pan Bus Lines customers will be required to submit to strict inspection of their britches prior to boarding a Peter Pan motorcoach to ensure there is no breech of security. Underwear has not been shown to provide any appreciable protection from salmonella, therefore, it has been deemed optional and the wearing of undergarments is at the customer's discretion.

I hope we have put your worries to rest and that you will feel safe, secure and protected while riding with Peter Pan Bus Lines. Thank you for your past patronage... we look forward to serving you in the future with your transportation needs.

Very truly yours,

Peter Pan Bus Lines, Inc.

Deborah A. Wuller

Assistant to the President

Beneath is the actual letter back. I would love to have Deborah Wuller's job.